Years ago I learned an important lesson from my friend Dr. Erik Knelson, an oncologist seeing patients in the clinic. In each appointment, after going through the details of the patient’s situation, he gave them time to ask questions by inquiring “do you have any questions for me?”
He noticed that some patients seemed hesitant to speak up, even after gentle prodding. Perhaps they were shy, or they didn’t think their concerns were important enough to mention. Then one day, Dr. Knelson was a patient receiving care from his doctor, who rearranged the question by asking “what questions do you have?”. Dr. Knelson loved it and started using it with his patients.
What a difference it made! By conveying that questions were not just allowed, but expected, patients started to speak up more regularly, which enabled them to dig into the underlying issues and concerns more thoroughly, instead of waiting for things to worsen.
If you’re not getting the kind of response you want from a teammate, boss or friend, pay attention to the question you’re asking. There might be an expectation built-in that you don’t intend, or there might be another way to ask the question that sets the tone you want.
Play with it. You may discover a handy question that you use again in the future.
To learn more about how The Questions Company can help you and your team design questions for your unique environment, please schedule a consultation.