Ants Working Together

When two ant colonies are placed side-by-side in a box of sand, they leave each other alone and co-exist peacefully.

But if the box is shaken up, the two colonies start to fight and they destroy each other.

In US politics it feels like we’ve been shaken up for years, especially in the last 6 months, fueled by Covid disruptions, global conflict, emerging technologies, and new media tactics.

We need to re-learn how to get along.

When we’re frustrated, it’s tempting to tell the other side where they’re misinformed.  Quite often, I wish I could reshape the other person’s brain to conform to my worldview.

But true connection starts with curiosity.

  • “Tell me, what do you make of all this?”
  • “Where do you think it leads?”
  • “What do you hope for?”
  • “What are you afraid of?”

As a country we have some growing to do. Not just “the other side”. Each of us.

We could keep beating each other up. But it doesn’t seem to be working.

Or we can create communities and workplaces with more understanding.  It starts by you and me asking more questions and listening with an intent to comprehend.

So try this: the next you find yourself angered or baffled by a friend or colleague’s viewpoint, see if you can find the empathy to say “that surprises me…will you explain it some more?”.

Thanks to Julie & John for this view into the ant world.

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Stephen Mayo

Seasoned Executive, Writer and Leadership Coach, Stephen Mayo is the founder of The Questions Company bringing an innovative coaching approach to help leaders connect with their team and accelerate their group’s effectiveness.

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